Saturday, February 18, 2012

Bad Artemis, No Doughnut...

That's right, no doughnut for me. I've been very naughty and haven't posted since God was a child. Okay, maybe it hasn't been quite that long, but still long enough to deserve a good swat on the bum. Not that I've been sitting around on my tuchus, doing nothing. Well, except for the week I was sick. But that was, like, two weeks ago, so it doesn't count for a lot. I HAVE been busy else wise. Just not with writing stuff. Which makes me sort of sad. And then what writing I DID work on, was this road-hog #shinynewidea, which as forbidden me from getting any 'work' type of editing/query stuff done. Mostly, anyway.

And then there's the fact that I've been forced into a starvation diet. Okay, okay, it's not *entirely* a starvation diet. Technically. See, apparently it is *possible* that all the joint issues I have over the years are not, in actuality, related to arthritis. At least not caused directly by it. No, apparently - at least based on preliminary testing - I may, in fact, have Celiac SPrue disease. Whatever that means. Uh, that was sarcastic. Being me, I've researched it and can tell you what it means. It means (if secondary testing, which I'll undergo later this month proves the diagnosis to be true) NO GLUTEN FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!! Which is where the second pun of my post title comes in. I really don't get a doughnut. Ever again. Unless I find a gluten free one. Or the diagnosis turns out to be wrong. Do you know how much gluten is in EVERYTHING? For an Irish/Italian girl that's like saying you can never wave your hands while talking again! No bread? I'm like a bread-free version of My Big Fat Greek Wedding! You don't eat bread? I'll fix you some biscuits. Biscuits aren't bread!

Okay, so, I CAN eat bread. But it has to be gluten free bread. Which is astonishingly hard to find unless you live beside a Whole Foods. I wasn't too surprised to find that because Americans (most of them) think flour that is any color but pristine white is 'gross' and 'contaminated' and 'looks wrong' virtually all flours contain 'enriched wheat' which in our country equates to 'genetically engineered wheat'. And that, at least in some studies, seems to be what causes a lot of the autoimmune reactions to gluten in people with Celiacs. There have been reports (though not studied in depth) that people with celiacs who vacation in Europe and consume 'old world' species of wheat, which have not be genetically altered and are pure strains, do not have any reaction to the gluten in those strains. But there is no scientific proof of that yet. At least, as far as I know. And I'm still learning. Maybe for nothing if the second round of testing shows that I don't, in truth, have Celiacs. But at the very least, I'll come out of it more educated.

ANYWAY, I promise that I will do my best to update my blog on a more regular schedule. I'll be sending out queries again soon (this time on Gone Missing Girl, formerly known as Amarok and the Gone Missing Girl) so I'll have that adventure to relay to you. Plus, until the end of the month, I have the saga of the gluten-free Irish/Italian twit to dramatize, which I feel I ought to make as fun and ridiculous as possible. Thank you to everyone who hasn't unfollowed, or unliked, or defriended or whatever it is on Blogger, me because of my lack of posting. And I hope all of you are well. You might have said on your own blogs, but I wouldn't know, because that's another set of stairs I've fallen down. But it's also something else that I intend to rectify.

2 comments:

  1. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    As a fellow Italian (who waves her hands during every single conversation, even the mundane ones) I must expend my deepest sympathies to the suckiness of no gluten world!

    *holds both hands up in a mega-dramatic shake for emphasis after I type that last sentence*

    Looks like you'll need to plan a trip to Europe soon :)

    Christi Corbett

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